Referrals are the engine of professional services.
Achim Nowak, Executive Coach and a dear mentor to me, has told me many times, "If you have been in business for over 2 years, and you are not getting referrals on a consistent basis; take a look at your business."
Why are referrals so powerful? Because peer validation is one of the most effective ways to transfer trust in professional services.
Let me give you an example: My mechanic is this guy who receives me in his house, serves my car on his front porch—no website, no logo, no fancy brand. He's my cousin's best friend's brother. And I trust him a lot more than the mechanic around the corner with 300 five-star reviews on Google. That's the power of a good referral.
So how do you get more of them? In today's article, we'll divide the art of referrals into two main categories: Passive and Active. Passive referrals are activities that you do to increase your "refer-ability," while active referrals involve a direct-ask approach.
Passive: Increasing your refer-ability
The referral process happens seemingly organically: People who know and trust us bring us up in conversation when someone they know has a problem we can fix.
The good news is that there are specific things you can do to make sure your name comes up at the right time.
1. Fix Your Positioning
Positioning is the connection your audience makes between your Brand and the Value they think you provide. A good positioning strategy creates a container (Brand<>Problem) in your target audience's mind.
Think of it like this: when someone mentions a specific problem, your name should pop into their head immediately. That only happens when three ingredients are in place:
- Clarity: The value you provide is clear to your audience. Your brand has focus.
- Relevance: The value you provide is useful to your audience. It's something worth the mental space.
- Repetition, repetition, repetition. Don't be afraid to say the same thing several times. That's what builds message penetration.
Want to get better perspective on your positioning? Use this prompt. Make sure to update the [VARIABLES]:
I'm a [YOUR PROFESSION: coach/consultant/advisor] who has been struggling with clear positioning in the market. I need help sharpening how I'm perceived so that when people think of [SPECIFIC OUTCOME/PROBLEM], they immediately think of me.
Current Situation:
My target audience is: [WHO YOU SERVE]
The transformation I provide is: [WHAT CHANGES FOR CLIENTS]
My background/expertise includes: [YOUR CREDENTIALS/EXPERIENCE]
What I Need From You:
Suggest 2-3 ways I could narrow my focus to create immediate recognition
Give me a sharp, memorable positioning statement that connects [MY BRAND] to [SPECIFIC VALUE] in my audience's mind
Provide 3-5 phrases I should repeat consistently across all my communication
Good positioning isn't about serving fewer people—it's about being unmistakably clear about the specific value I deliver so the RIGHT people find me instantly.A common business trap is to try to be a solution for everybody. In episode #5 of The Business Of Trust, the brilliant and incredibly successful Marcia Reynolds, Ph.D. said to me, "I finally made the decision that I'm a coach's coach. I like working with coaches or leaders that want to coach... As soon as I focused, the business took off, and it wasn't a struggle at all anymore."
2. Stay in touch frequently
We tend to give more importance to things that are recent. So if I read a great piece of content from you this morning, I am a lot more likely to refer you in my conversation later that day.
Here's what works:
- Newsletters work GREAT.
- Post comments on their LinkedIn Posts
- Phone call or lunch to catch up
My personal tech stack:
- I use Mailchimp for my email newsletter. Simple, good deliverability rate, widely interconnected, and cheap.
- I keep a list of all my key relationships in Monday.com, with their info, a link to their LinkedIn page and a reminder of when my next outreach should be.
- PRO TIP: If you go to LinkedIn > My Network > Catch Up (Tab) > Birthday, you can see the birthday of some of your connections.
3. Give the extra mile
Referrals are a client's way to say thank you. When you give the extra mile, you cultivate raving fans. It's the classic underpromise and overdeliver.
In my experience, the early stages of the relationship are where this has the most impact. Consider out-of-scope ways to give the extra mile and offer quick wins in the first 90 days of your engagement.
4. Pro tip: Anybody can be a source of referrals
Last week I received a message from a girl I dated for a little bit several years ago. A friend of hers was looking for someone to help her with a new website. She thought of me because she saw my Instagram post from my podcast, The Business Of Trust.
Anybody who knows you can become a referral source, not just clients or professional contacts. That's why everything you share publicly matters.
Active: Asking for a referral
The problem with passive referrals is that you don't have direct influence. At times it can feel like a rollercoaster. So what do you do? You can ask directly. But that can be cringy, and make you come across as needy...Right? Well, not necessarily.
Here's what I've found works in my experience:
5. A New Offer
Launch a new offer for a specific group of people with a specific problem. Then call your clients and ask them if they know anybody who would be interested in this new specific entry-level offer.
The key is specificity. The more precise you are about who you're looking for, the easier it is for someone to think of the right person.
Example: "Hey Doug, I am creating a program where I am turning consultants' IP into AI tools that can be used as lead-gens. I am trying to connect with consultants who are also authors and have been in the game for a few years. Does anybody come to mind?"
Doug doesn't have to think through his entire network, he just has to think of consultants who are authors. That makes it easy for him to help you. If multiple groups of people can benefit, you can ask Doug permission to brainstorm with you.
Use this prompt to help you come up with ideas of entry-level offers:
I'm a [YOUR PROFESSION] looking to create a new, specific entry-level offer that I can use to generate referrals from my existing network and clients.
My Context:
My core expertise/service is: [WHAT YOU'RE KNOWN FOR]
My ideal clients are: [WHO YOU SERVE BEST]
Common problems I solve: [LIST 2-3 SPECIFIC PROBLEMS]
My existing clients include: [TYPES OF PEOPLE/BUSINESSES]
What I Need:
Help me generate 3-5 new offer ideas that are:
Specific - Solves one clear problem for one clear group
Entry-level - Lower commitment than my main services (price, time, or scope)
Referral-friendly - Easy for my clients to immediately think of someone who needs this
For each offer idea, provide:
The Offer Name/Description
Who it's specifically for (the more narrow, the better)
What specific problem it solves
The referral ask script - How I would call a current client and ask if they know anyone who would benefit from this specific offer
Example format I'm looking for:
"Hey [CLIENT NAME], I'm creating [NEW SPECIFIC OFFER] for [VERY SPECIFIC GROUP] who are struggling with [SPECIFIC PROBLEM]. I'm trying to connect with [IDENTIFYING CHARACTERISTICS]. Does anybody come to mind?"6. Brainstorm together
Genuinely ask for help and have your clients brainstorm with you about who you can reach out to.
Example: "Hey Anne, I am considering entering the Healthcare industry. I know it's competitive and I wanted to pick your brain on how you think is the best way to gain access. Who are some organizations or people I should keep an eye on?"
What makes this work: You're not putting Anne on the spot to give you a name right now. You're asking for her expertise, which feels natural and collaborative.
7. Make it an event.
Events have the power of bringing us together and creating momentum. Consider an invite-only workshop. Send direct invites to your current and former clients, and tell them to bring a friend who can benefit from it.
The beauty of this approach is that you're not asking for a referral. You're giving them an excuse to invite someone they care about to something valuable.
Your Move
Referrals don't happen by accident. They happen when you're clear about who you serve, stay top of mind with the right people, and aren't afraid to ask.
Start with one thing from this article this week... fix your positioning, reach out to three past clients, or create that specific offer.
The conversation that leads to your next referral might be closer than you think.